The AD of ADHD stands for Attention Deficit. However, that’s not been my experience of the hundreds of adults and children with whom I have worked. Instead, I call it Attention Difference because they are paying attention, loads of attention, to all sorts of things, all at the same time. As an example:
• Places to go
• People to meet
• Appointments to attend
• Things to be done, (need to prioritise them first)
• Things I should have done
• Things I did do and now I’m worried about what I did and how I did it
• The radio’s too loud
• The lights are too bright
• My desk is a mess
• My colleague’s upset
• I’m getting hungry and
• Everybody’s waiting on me!
• OVERLOAD /DOWN TOOLS!
So, whether just starting out or a CEO, the result is complete Overwhelm and a Garbo moment of ‘I want to be alone…!’. By this stage we call it Burnout because it has all the hallmarks of chronic fatigue – brain fog, can’t make decisions, exhaustion etc. but the causes and treatments are very different for Neurodivergents.
Where does Neurodivergent Overwhelm come from?
The feeling of being overloaded comes from your mind being fully aware of everything around you, all at once. Brains are naturally wired to pick up on many things at the same time, but this constant, expanded awareness adds another layer to the overload. Using ADHD as an example:
1. People with ADHD tend to be more sensitive to the sights, sounds, and even the emotions in your environment. This means you are constantly processing more than others might notice, which can quickly feel overwhelming, especially when there’s a lot happening at once.
2. ADHD makes it hard to figure out what to focus on first. Because everything seems important, it’s easy to feel like you need to give attention to everything at once. This can create a sense of mental juggling where it’s hard to know where to start or what deserves the most energy. This most commonly causes people to do nothing. I call this ‘going on strike’ or, if you’re in burnout, it’s an enforced Stop.
3. Managing tasks and time can feel like a constant uphill battle. Even when someone with ADHD is aware of all the things that need to be done, it can be difficult [impossible?] to break them down in a way that’s manageable. This leads to feeling scattered – doing a bit of this one and that one – until you’re overwhelmed, and unsure where to focus first.
4. Because of the lack of filters, people with ADHD sensitivities may feel emotionally triggered by everything that’s going on around them. Each awareness, whether it’s a task, a family concern, or a work issue, can stir up stronger feelings, adding to the sense of overload.
5. When someone with ADHD becomes deeply focused on one thing, it can be easy to forget about everything else – until they come out of that intense focus, when they’re faced with the whole list of things that still need attention, their tea’s cold and they missed the deadline!
At its core, ADHD brains are holding onto everything at once, which makes it hard to process or manage without feeling overloaded. Apply that across all areas of your life and it’s no wonder you feel overwhelmed.
Can anything be done?
First, I’d like to counter the idea that being Neurodivergent is a problem. People worry about this but it’s just something you are and worrying about it won’t change anything. I talk about the gift of being Super-Sensory and installing better Filters. So it’s not a problem and we have workaround strategies to help you. All positive.
Second, is to appreciate the talents of your very special brain and repattern it to work with you comfortably and efficiently. The beauty is, with the right support you can learn to navigate this storm of awareness and find a balance that fits.
It’s all about identifying baby steps to accommodate your wiring so you can choose what to focus on and park the rest until you’re ready to action them. The difference that makes the difference is holding you accountable and we stick with you as you make the changes.
All done in a spirit of kindness and support.
YOU WERE BORN WHOLE AND NOTHING’S CHANGED SINCE THEN.
To your health, wellbeing and success.
Read about how I worked with one young man with ADHD here.
Find out how I can help you recover from burnout or manage your anxiety.