Navigating Success

Navigating Success: Unveiling the Blueprint for Leaders to Thrive in Business and in Life

Welcome to a transformative journey, where the relentless drive to excel meets the serene embrace of life’s intricate tapestry. Navigating Success will unravel the secrets that empower successful leaders to lead not just profitable enterprises but profoundly fulfilling lives both at work and at home.

In the fast-paced arena of success, where Type-A personalities reign supreme, the notion of a balanced life often seems like an elusive mirage. However, what if we dared to challenge the status quo? What if, beyond the chaos of demanding careers and high-stakes decisions, there existed a blueprint—an extraordinary guide for successful leaders to not only navigate the intricate paths of success but to harmonize the complexities of their private lives?

For, amidst the hustle and bustle of leadership and success, there exists a quiet echo from the past – the forgotten whispers of a childhood that shapes our present more than we realise.

The heritage of our upbringing

Speaking personally, I had a perfectly normal(!) childhood in a studious household in which sport was completely ignored! (BTW, all children think their childhood is normal.) I learnt to have no regard for a ball being: In the net, Over the Net, Down the Hole, Over the Line, Off-side, In or Out. PE was to be endured!

I neither expected to be, nor was I chosen for any sporting team and the only time they were short of runners, I dropped the baton! Mind you, as Lady Catherine de Bourgh proclaims in ‘Pride and Prejudice’, “If I had ever learnt, I should have been a great proficient.”

Has this been a problem in my life? Do I feel I’ve missed out? Absolutely not. None of this is a problem unless I develop a sudden urge to do Pilates; which would be like applying lemon juice to a paper cut.

Inextricable link with wellbeing

In 1998 a ground-breaking study carried out by Dr Vincent Felitti and Robert Andas clearly demonstrated the inextricable link between the level of adversity and trauma experienced in childhood and the illnesses that emerge in adults. These are referred to as Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE).

Further studies went on to show how the direct correlation between the number of childhood stressors and unprocessed traumas have proven to be accurate predictors of major illnesses, such as heart disease, strokes and cancers as well as being linked to a much higher incidence of auto immune conditions; and with each additional ACE, the risk increases:

  • 20% more likely to be hospitalised with Auto-immune disease
  • 600% increased risk of CFS/ME
  • Triple lifetime risk of lung cancer, stroke and heart disease

With 6+ACEs:

  • 20-year difference in life expectancy!
  • 4600% risk of intravenous drug use
  • up to 5000% suicide risk

ACE has a lifelong physiological effect on physical health & behaviour.

How are ACEs created?

Growing up in a home with controlling or divorcing parents, a loss of a beloved relative or friend being bullied and/or feeling unsafe creates a low level ongoing toxic stress which affects how we see ourselves in the world and whether we will feel confident to try new things or hold ourselves back. It also determines how easy or challenging we will find our close relationships and even our self-care.

But I’m a resilient leader – how is this relevant to me?

Quite normal situations show up as an internal threat or small ‘t’ trauma in adulthood; especially if the child lacked the support they needed at the time. This sets up an inappropriate trigger; for example, if a leader gets angry or defensive when challenged I might ask them, what did ‘being criticised’ mean to you when you were young?

In any difficult situation, humans are resourceful and will recognise the need to make things better. These coping mechanisms, whether positive or negative, become automatic over time. This explains why more and more adults are finding themselves trapped in cycles of anger, instead of being able to move forward and experience peace of mind.

How are ACE traumas triggered in adulthood?

Wounds from ACE trauma slumber quietly in the background, until triggered by people, situations or circumstances to which your response is unexpected and extreme; akin to PTSD. From a director inexplicably going to pieces when standing up to speak, a CEO finding themselves entangled in a difficult personal relationship or an executive suddenly and inexplicably exploding with anger. They’re all signs of a trigger unleashing a reaction.

So, what is the Blueprint to Thrive in Business and Life?

The Blueprint involves getting your ACEs sorted so they no longer act as triggers. As soon as you resolve early trauma, you’ll stop noticing instances and allow yourself to focus on other things. The easiest way to do it is:
1. Complete a 360 Life Audit – business, relationship, family, health etc
2. Identify what’s working well and where the issues are;
3. Choose the area to work on first;
4. Resolve and clear issues;
5. Integrate a new strategy;
6. Observe improvements;
7. Repeat.
During this process you’ll unhook emotions, reframe meaning, disable the triggers, Choose new behaviours and set goals for the future. It’s easy and enjoyable to do.

“Caroline holds you in a safe and tender space whilst she works her magic. She guided me to heal some relationship issues with my family that have haunted me for years. Her insights have helped me to connect with my future in a clear and positive way. I feel lighted, brighter and filled with enthusiasm!”

Slings and Arrows

Be cheered, we arrive at now, with a plethora of slings and arrows that have knocked us into shape or redirected where we were heading and that’s fine; it’s called Life.
But is it time to set yourself free?
To your freedom
Caroline

If you’d like to know whether you’ve been affected by ACEs, we have a short test.
Use the form below to get in touch or email me, details on my contact page here.

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